“Turn and face the strain.”
The time has come for me to ponder all the things that are changing this time of year… and the things that aren’t.
I’ve mentioned before that like Spencer on Pretty Little Liars (which isn’t coming back until like June and I’m pretty upset about it,) I don’t live well in the gray areas. The things that are almost happening but not quite, or the things that are all happening too quickly and all at once.
I needed to keep change in mind this past week as the job search has gotten a little bit harder… and as birthdays have reminded me that I’m a little bit older and I still haven’t got my life figured out yet. Hell, I don’t even have the subject of my blog figured out yet. It’s more of a welcome to Stephanie’s mind, take a look around. But, let’s take this a few steps at a time. Let’s look at some things that have and haven’t changed this year, things that I’m okay with, that I’m going to be okay with, that I have to be okay with.
- I became a Fifth Harmony fangirl. What can I say? “Work From Home” is catchy as hell. I can pass on the video that objectifies both men and women in the worst way possible, but the song. The song is so good.
- Crazy leggings became my new fashion statement. Thanks to LuLaRoe, lots of hip moms everywhere + me are rocking wild leggings from a brand that is sold by consultants much in the same way that Mary Kay or Pampered Chef are sold. And also Facebook groups. I’m now the proud owner of leggings with: unicorns, radios, dinosaurs, cupids, octopuses, etc.
- I gained confidence. And lost it some days. But mostly gained it. I’ve learned that sometimes you aren’t going to be happy with all of your work, and sometimes you’re going to feel like you’re not good enough. But spending so much time worrying about trying to be the best isn’t healthy. And it isn’t me.
- I got tired of eating pizza. Probably the saddest day of my life.
- Makeup became my favorite thing and Sephora became my greatest weakness.
- I helped raise over $600,000 for my favorite cause.
- I turned 22. And with it came all that wasn’t already unsure at age 21.
- I’m probably still going to eat pizza.
- I still do not have a job lined up.
- I still have the greatest friends and family ever. They’re the biggest group of cheerleaders. I hope they know how thankful I am for the constant pushes to do my best.
- Radio is still there for me. I’m still glad that I chose the less popular branch of broadcast as my future career.
- I still like dogs more than most people.
- I’m still 100% no filter, no bs Stephanie Beckett. I’m still nervous about what I’m doing with the rest of my life. I’m not alone in this feeling, but it’s scary. And that’s okay.